Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Deadline met

After surviving on a diet of buns, cheese and Maggi for a week mom's chicken curry tasted like ambrosia today afternoon. And I cannot even describe how my bed feels like, after a week of sleeping in a sleeping bag on the floor of my office room. But the real high, after and in spite of all this, is that I met my deadline! You might think I am crazy. Not that I am not. But I am really elated about the fact I can still do it. That and being very content with what I have, has just made today's all-day-sleeping-ritual very successful.

It's February once again. My month. Delhi is just grand at this time of the year. If you ever plan to visit Delhi, now is the time. Something in the air changes during this time, it's like the world is really happy about my being alive! And even if I just beat Narcissus at being narcissistic, who cares!

Ah! But the point is someone does care. Yes, it is you I am talking to. I am kind of tied down in what I can say here. Like I was in what I could do when I met you. I do not dare think about desiring you. You want to know why? I brought it back from the borders of obsession once. I do not want to venture there again. I have stayed away from the why and the how, and from asking you why not, because I surrendered long ago, unconditionally. Do not ask me why I do not fight. I wanted to, more than anything else, for you. But you know the answer. It was your choice. I'll respect that. Till the very end.

I really want to thank you people out there, those who read what ever I wrote and said kind words. Even those who read and did not say anything. This blog has been a boon. I have met the most beautiful (literally and otherwise), and wonderful people through it. I have forged new friendships, which I hope will last my lifetime.

Other things which happened in the past weeks are that I splurged on new clothes after eons. I bought two pairs of cool denims, one black and one blue. And I was sooo tempted to buy an absolutely enchanting jacket. Alas! My purse had other plans. It had returned to it's state of stable equilibrium, i.e., it was empty. I also met Z again after a long time. It was refreshing as always.

I've learnt to count my blessings. In the past year I have found new meanings for love, strength, friendship, resilience and pushed the limits of my endurance. Tomorrow can only be better.

Life, being born in the palm of my hand,
The world changes pace, as I dare to demand,
To be heard, and brought to bear,
A warm embrace, spanning far and near,
In another time, I'll not bow down,
Neither to a mortal life, nor a heavenly crown,
If anything be true, it has to be this,
Never has anyone desired more, that priceless kiss.


  1. tomorrow IS going to be better..my friend.. it IS.. in all that you feel.
    because you feel.

    ive just realised myself.. that...keeping my feelings to myself.. just leaves me empty...sort of like on chain...and i cannot really be myself...which is why..i am trying not to keep them closed in anymore....

  2. You slept on the office floor?! You give a new meaning to good work ethics!

  3. @grafx: Good that you realized... better now than never.

    @sine: And to think my boss doesn't appreciate me enough!

  4. thatz one helluvan optimistic blog.
    jus wish i think on those lines too...