Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Waiting between words

Another ten minutes before check-in starts. Whoa! Look at those platform heels! How does a girl walk in those? Hmmm... she is not as tall as the other one. Her sister maybe. The heels... an effort to catch up? Thank goodness, she does not want things like that.

And she never gives out
And she never gives in
She just changes her mind...


7 hrs wait at the airport. I hate travelling alone. Will you make it?"

Why doesn't this line move! Thank goodness, I brought the discman.

"Can I have your passport please? Are you travelling together?"

Duh! Lady - Indian passport - US Passport - to Europe - to the States - travelling together? Have a heart! Where ARE you.

"Obrigado, Senhora."

A call!! Why is she calling? Cut the call, cut the call! Again!

On international roaming. Phone balance low. Can't talk.

She sang as if she knew me,
in all my dark despair,
And then she looked right through me
as if I wasn't there...


Passport check. A smiling immigration officer for a change!

"Do I have to take off the belt too?" "No, sir. You may go."

No reply, still! Was it something urgent? No way to call her from here.

"Mama!"

Ooooh, sho cute baby! Mama ... your boy is running away into duty free shopping. Dufry. What are they selling? The Dream Angel's collection from Victoria's Secret. Wonder how that smells! Are they holding hands? When was the last time we held hands? That long ago... I didn't get to see anything of this city. Should I buy some souvenirs?

"Last call for JJ3429 to Santiago."

"Do you want a phone card?"

Cute girl... nice tan. Nice smile too. Smile back.

"Não, obrigado."

Look at that! She just popped the pacifier in the mouth of her wailing baby and went into the smoking chamber to smoke. Figure that! The boy's stopped wailing! Obviously, I am still a far cut away from being a parent. Another hour to boarding.

Try as I may I can never explain,
what I feel when you don't say a thing...


Must not fall asleep. Will she be there, when I get back? Just one more chance... just one more. Where is the drinking water! So thirsty... When is that story due? Monday? Ummmm... yes. Let's set the ringer to full volume. Maybe before boarding... The story... hmmm... let's see that now.

Another ten minutes before check-in starts...

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

All my fault

Her mood rumbled, in resonance to the dark clouds outside. It had been a long night. She had just returned home, to him and to the brewing storm. The sky was an uncanny gray. The cool breeze of the previous night had slithered to a stop. The enveloping dampness was threatening to break into a million shards of rain any instant.

He lay on her lap, with his face buried in the soft, crumpled folds of her nightgown. Slowly he turned his face to look at her blank eyes. "Don't worry. Why are you so worried? It is my fault. I'll take care of it." He could see she was angry. No. More exasperated than angry perhaps. He always knew when she had... He had stopped keeping count. Counting was a very cumbersome way to love.

Why didn't he arouse her! Give her goosebumps or make her heart skip a beat? Why was the only thing he ever made her feel was an overwhelming sense of calm.

"I am..." He turned and kissed her thighs. Her voice trailed off among whispering leaves of the mango tree near the window. She hated this guilt crawling beneath her skin. She hated it.

Why didn't he ever do anything? He didn't even try! Not even once in all these years! What is he waiting for? An order? A request? Why!

"You are the laziest..."

"... of the lot. I know. The oldest, slowest, laziest... I told you it is all my fault."

Her fingers caressed his wild curls, tracing the boundary of his receding hairline. Rain broke free of misty prison of the clouds with a frenzy. Truant drops dashed on the window sill with a vengeance and orphaned droplets found their way to his cheek.

He had shown the promise of turning out like every other possessive and demanding man. But somewhere along the way, he had lost the will to possess. Maybe he felt left too far behind... at the back of the line.

Her fingers rested on his soft stomach, bubbling on the ripples of his gentle laugh. Rogue streaks of lightning lit the transparent darkness in the room. He lay there, lifeless, hugging her waist with his face hidden from the world outside. She sat there, quiet and quivering with the storm, secure in his unquestioning calm and the knowledge that it was all his fault.

Monday, June 04, 2007

What remains

Once it was so,
Like the silver moonlight
over the supple night earth
Bright yet gentle,
With the calm assurance
of lapping waves on the sand
Eroded yet reborn,
In twirling grains
of wizened woods green with age
Proud yet humble.

Now it is so,
Like frosty moonlight
over the wet night earth
Enchanting yet ephemeral,
Inside the succulent flesh
a core of bitter memories
Distant yet distinct,
A magical quilt of light
shimmering in frigid polar skies
Alien yet natural.

Suspended within then and now,
My love weeps beside my grave.