Absolutely Lost

I thought I knew all the ways which went,
Into my head and heart, every turn, every descent.

I thought I knew when to feel happy and when sad,
When manners were really good, and when they were just a fad,

I thought I could give answers and earnestly inquire,
When I felt too hot, just perspire.

I thought the lines on a beautiful face traced out art,
The best thing in the confectionery was a lemon tart.

I thought in a crowd I was free, and busy when left to myself,
While diamonds have to be mined, corals grow on a shelf.

I thought the moon was night's cohort, as the sun was for day,
It was okay to shiver in December, and get a heat stroke in May.

I thought that I could think a solitary thought at a time,
Dialogue was the overburdened cousin of the neglected mime.

I thought I could sleep, and dream the dream of an eternal quest,
Everything done needs to be done just a wee bit better than the best.

I thought I could live without the voice of any reasonable lust,
Accept every association without outrage or disgust.

I thought I alone should fill the world, and overflow still,
Be confidant absolute, and earn every form of trust and goodwill.

Instead I seem to be floundering in the dark, star-crossed,
Stranded midway between a life and a half, absolutely lost.